My trip in Poland, good plan, fun stories, and some mistakes

                                                        My trip in eastern Europe

Hi guy (and maybe some girls)

I want to tell you about my 1500 km trip in Eastern Europe, it lasted 15 days. I’m gone with one friend by car from Moselle (my departement) it’s bordeline from Luxembourg.

                                               1992 VolkWagen Golf gen 3rd (like my birthyear)
                                                                     Yeah old school baby

1st : Prague (republic Tchec)

Nice city, interresting architecture, the life is cheaper than in France, the girls are pretty, but it’s not still exotic like I’m looking for. We stay just one night for continue to road again and again.

                         This hostel youth was rather classy, a real castel, this name is Hostel HOMEr
                                                               I recommend it

2nd : Krakowie: Stay tuned, it’s fun…

Yeah, that’s the life ! This wonderful city look like Dysneyland Paris (the devil side less). Everything is clean. There are not cigarettes or this f*cking mask on the ground, Jesus Christ is everywhere (it is comforting) and a lot of facades of buildings are paint with differents colors, like the decor of the movie « Les demoiselles de Rochefort ». You can go aboard the horses drawn carriage on the medieval streets, what a view ! The time has definitly stood still.

                                  For the moment, I look like okay ? Wait for it…

Now we are in Poland. And the girls are… How to say… She comes from an other galaxy. The top 5-10% most beautifuls girls of your french students city (Nancy, Strasbourg, Lyon, etc.) is perhaps around the 30-33% of the same beauty level of Polish girls. At the beginning, my friend (Laurent) say me :

« Calm down Jimmy, it’s maybe, cause it’s a big city. There’s always a pretty girls in these place. Let’s wait a bit.» And the time has proved him wrong.

When the night fall, the trap coming.

With my friend, we said :

« We go to the bar, we chat with local people for learn to know them, we don’t go to the strip club right ? »

After a couple of beer, and some vodka, the song of siren was to seductive, and we take place in the strip club. An angel move on the pole dance, and she sit next to me. She begin to provide us a 2,3,4,5 shots of vodka round free and also beers. We smoke some cigarettes, chatting, and when she takes my hand for go to dance… I know I make a mistake but how to say no to an Angel, forgive me. She bring me in a private place, for a private show, and she continue to provide me some vodka shot, while she dances I smoke my last cigarette in the earth of hell. She was wonderful.

She call her boss for be paid for the show, and at this moment, I make huge mistake. I took out my tourist wallet filled with a lot of money paper euro bank and I give her my bank card.

The only thing I remember is :

I falldown next the stripper, totally drunk, my ears were ringing, my nose right next to her 15 cm heels, and I explode with laughter like a joker. I can read on these glossy lips :

« Are you okay ? Are you okay ?»

I dont know who, but they kick me out and I fall like a shit on a bench in the street. Probably my guardian angel call a taxi (cause I’ve no batterie on my cellphone) and I show to the taxi driver the hotel reservation invoice, without say words. I dont remember the code of the hotel door, the sun rise up and I don’t know what to do. I see the Laurent’s Golf III on the hotel parking, and lucky strike !
The car’s trunk was not locked. So, I sleep some hours on the back seat, until the sun burns my dry eyes. At about 10 AM I join my friend in his room with my dirty face and we chat just a bit. I check my phone, looking my account bank and …

« Oh shit… -300€ » « My wallet : oh shiiiiit -200€. »

My budget was 700€ for 2 weeks, and I spend 500€ at the third day… My banking advisor send me a text message :

« We see a anormal activity in Poland with your credit card, can you confirm that is it you ? ».

I answered : « Yes don’t worry, everything is fine, I visited my family in Poland for the holiday.»

You talk yeah, I got racked by a stripped like a pigeon instead.

We take the road again with my friend and we take a break for eat in a lost country restaurant. I have a headache, I want to vomit, I’m sweating, thirsty, I was stressed about not having any more money to continue the trip and to top it off, I received a text from my ex-mother-in-law. She tells me that my ex girlfriend (who took care of my dog during this trip) had discomfort while walking the dog and that she is in the hospital and the dog at the pound. His mother then asked me for a photo of my ID to retrieve my dog from the pound. I am exhausted. I shed a tear in silence. My friend comforts me, tells me that he will advance me the future expenses, and that it will be okay. Thanks you Laurent.

                                                             Me and my hommies Laurent.

3rd : Lublin

This city smell the 60’s in France. A lot of womens wears flower dress, there are no african in the street and there are some musicians in the front of the restaurant. Don’t need to take your shi*ty mask everywhere (sorry I hate this thing). In Poland the traditional dish in the restaurants looks like Alsacian specialities : Potatoes, cabbage, pork, spaetzle (type of pasta) and it cost about 10,12€ for a good meal. Only thing that I find it missing : there are no bread on the table. Never. After eating we go to the bar in the street. It’s look like a beach club. There are some deckchairs on the sand and the cocktails are very cheap and good and big, it’s a real flowerpot for 4 or 5€ ! It’s very typical frenchy to be proud to only drink some beer when I think about it. If as a french you don’t drink any cocktails is just cause it’s too expensive. We chat with some girls and they accept to joins us without any difficulties (it was 7,5-8/10). As a french, be well dressed, stylish and you’re attractive, trust me. We hit the road the next morning for the farthest point Bialowieza.

                                                            classical polish meal.

4th Bialowieza

My friend Laurent is passionated about the wilderness. And the first goal of this trip was for him to visited the primary forest of Bialowieza on the border of Bielarussia. It’s look like Jurassik Park, you can watch some wolves, bears, and buffalo on this forest. She’s a 15 000 years old and there are never been exploited by any human activity. You don’t allowed to walk alone on these land. It’s very protected. We stay 4 days, and we participed at night a visit guided by Joao (a real passioneted guy about his job, I learn a lot of things) with night vision binocular. It was real interresting but we don’t have see anything, maybe a rabbit. My dream was to watch a wolf pack attacked a buffalo. But… not this night. During the 4 days in Bialowieza, I continue to work online. I’m a redactor in Freelance on 5€.com and you know what ? I was able to get my money back lost in the strip club and continue to assumed the road. Yeah, 3 deep work at the morning and the luck smile on you. Thanks Jean-Ma.

We rented a small traditional house in the village of XXX on the Belarusian border. And surprise it is not only the dishes which are Alsatian, there are also the birds. Cigons 5th. Warszawa

To be honest, I’m fall in love with this city. This city is split in two, the old and the new city. The old city is typical european with a lot of church, and some tiny streets and the new city look like american city, with bigs builduigs and large avenue and you know what ? At the heart of the big roundabout of this city, you can admired the status of « Monsieur Charles de Gaulle ».


We stay 6 days in this crazy town. To put it simply, in the morning in a tea room I worked my writing, in the afternoon I flirted with the girls in the street and in the evening with Laurent we played in an arcade room. The place is called « Zagrywki » It’s a great place to challenge girls to want to play against you and if she ever loses then she pays for the beers. The most of times, the girls accept to play, they are fun, and we drank a lot. I recommend this place. We went in a crazy place, the name is : The Sen. It’s the most PIMP place ever made in Warszawa. I recommend too. But wear your best suit. Thanks Cesar G3 (a DBL bro for this advice). A place I recommend too is in the border of the river, the Vistule. They are a lot of boats with the party on it. You can find about 35%-50% of womens and girls on each boat and 75% of her are just amazing. Believe me. I kissed 3 differents girls and and I have 3 dates on 6 days on this crazy city. For the party as a French, Warszawia is actually better than Paris.

I love Poland.

                                     The golden genetic girl I’ve never date. Bye Emilia.

The + -everything is 3 to 4 times cheaper -Girls are 3-4 times more beautiful -We’re not driving you crazy with covid. -As a French, if you are stylish and have an online business, you are ultra attractive. -It’s a Catholic white country so … it’s okay. -Everyone (those under 40) speak excellent English.

The -

  • The restaurants are neither French or Italian.
  • We quickly notice you in the street as a tourist and the rabateurs want to take you to strip clubs (every 50 meters).
  • Polish boys are a bit cheesy. They like the tuning car and are a bit rude.

                                  A little dedication of the one and only king of dwarf.

                                                Don’t worry about my dog, he’s fine.

                                                  The time was long without you bastard.

Super Topic !

Glad you liked our dear Poland.

Too bad you couldn’t visit Wroclaw, it’s an amazing city too.


Yes, I’ve heard a lot a good things about Wroclaw. Maybe for my next trip.

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Cool !

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