Expatriation for lone wolves: why you still need a community

Maybe you’re thinking about expatriation and you’re wondering… « why the hell would I need a community anyways? I can do everything on my own! »

I used to think this way… but I changed my mind. I’ll tell you why.

I left France almost three years ago, on my own. All this time, I haven’t met anyone from my home country — not a single person. I didn’t care about feeling lost in a foreign country or struggling with the local language. Hence I never felt the need for a community.

Today, we’ve gathered a local section. And to be honest, I regret we didn’t make it happen before.

We’re not gonna talk about communitarianism. It has been discussed at length by Olivier, head of the local Bulgarian section. You can check out his channel on Telegram :point_right: right here.

There’s something else I wanna talk about.

People here are great. Really, they are. But there’s one thing you should know: they will never really understand you.

I’m not talking about the culture. Of course, you’ll experience such a gap. And it will take time until you can get a grasp of the local culture. What I’m actually talking about is you making the conscious choice of leaving the West.

I’ll explain further.

Jean-Marie talked about it quite a lot. And anyone who’s been living abroad for a while can confirm: the West is still seen as the place to be. For how long, fuck knows… but to this day, it is.

That’s why so many people leave the East for the West… and we are doing the exact opposite!

Can you see how strange that sounds for these people? :thinking:

When they will first meet you, one of these thoughts will inevitably cross their mind.

  • :speech_balloon: Okay, some things probably suck in your country but you’re exaggerating!
  • :speech_balloon: You’re idealizing my country. One day, you’ll understand how bad it really is!
  • :speech_balloon: But… my friend moved to Paris and he says it’s awesome!
  • :speech_balloon: You probably left because you had bad experiences over there, that’s not the case for everyone!
  • :speech_balloon: You’ve just arrived here. Give it a few more months and you’ll change your mind!

They will agree with you on a few subjects. that’s for sure. Taxes, immigration, sanitary regulations, whatever… some will admit that the grass is not greener.

But as a whole, very few people will truly understand your choice :x:

You’ll always be seen as the weird guy who left the best place on Earth to live in a hellhole.

And while you probably won’t be whining every night over it like « I’m so sad, no one gets me :disappointed_relieved: » , it will slowly but surely become a toll.

But that’s only when you are isolated.

Once you have a community around you — and I’m not talking about any community: a like-minded community — it changes everything. That’s what DBL is about. Your brothers share your vision, your values and your hobbies.

That’s REALLY powerful.

You won’t feel like you’re fighting the waves anymore :ocean:

But there’s something else: remember how I told you people will see you as a weirdo?

You won’t here them if you have a community. If you’re not the only one spreading the word, you won’t sound so delusional anymore. Your voice will start to matter. You’ll be in the position to warn locals of what’s coming for them if they listen to the siren song.

All in all, here’s my message:

  • You don’t join a local section just to avoid feeling lost in an other country
  • You don’t join a local section just to have people to hang out with
  • You don’t join a local section just because it’s hard to use a foreign language

You join a local section because you need it to save the territory :crown:

It is your duty to come over here and unite with your brothers. Really, it’s a matter of survival.


I agree totally with you Alex !

I spent 35 years of my life abroad, Africa, America, Asia… and I have always been a lone wolf. It was okay before but times have now changed .

Young men always want to prove to themselves and to others that they can survive by themselves, on their own… Understandable. But this time is different !

Like Alex I stongly urge you all to join a loacal section and have friends in your own community.

For me to join DBL, at my age, was not a natural thing to do. But based on my experience abroad I reckon that Jean-Marie is doing the right thing and for the right reason. 🙋